11 Jokes Only Smart People Will Get

Clickbait header! Did it work on you?
It reeled me in like a carp on a tiger nut.
Now some might say intellectual
humor isn’t as funny as a good
fart joke, but you still expect
to be amused on some level.
Or challenged, if the joke is
some “next level” shit. But these
weren’t funny or smart. Here
they are in no particular order~

1: What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

2: There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who read binary, and those who don’t.

3: There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.

4: A Freudian slip is when you meant to say one thing but you accidentally say Mother.

5: Welcome to plastic surgery anonymous. I see we have a lot of new faces here tonight.

6: A photon going through airport security: “I don’t have baggage, I’m travelling light”

7: C,Eb, and G walk into a bar. The bartenders says “sorry we don’t serve minors”.

8: A palindrome walks into a bar, says “Syasraba otni sklawem ordnilapa”.

9: Entropy isn’t what it used to be.

10: There’s a new band called 1023MB. They haven’t got any gigs yet.

11:

Well, I do like 11 a little bit. Probably because I remember that stupid intro song.

And who said “camp” never made it on tv?

One for the road:

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ‘Amal.’ The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan’. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ”But they are twins. If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.”

You guys have any good jokes? I sure don’t.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in humor, Post weakly and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to 11 Jokes Only Smart People Will Get

  1. Steve Ruis says:

    Groan … groan … the only positive response allowed for groaners.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hariod Brawn says:

    I just told my pet owl that I got engaged to be married. He said, “You twit, to who?”

    Liked by 6 people

  3. Judy says:

    I was cool with the groaners but Batman has handed me an earworm that may force me to listen to “Under the Boardwalk” and Alvin just to get rid of it. Then again, it’s like using sticky tape to remove sticky tape from your fingers…

    Liked by 2 people

  4. The Veterinarian
    ————————-

    One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the pastor
    of a small Florida church found a pink envelope containing $1000. It
    happened again the next week. The following Sunday, he watched as
    the offering was collected and saw a little old lady put the
    distinctive pink envelope in the plate.

    This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity,
    approached her. “Ma’am, I couldn’t help but notice that you put $1,000
    a week in the collection plate,” he stated.

    “Why yes,” she replied, “every week my son sends me money, and I
    give some of it to the church.”

    The pastor replied, “That’s wonderful, how much does he send you?”

    The old lady said, “$10,000 a week.”

    The pastor was amazed. “Your son is very successful; what does he do
    for a living?”

    “He is a veterinarian,” she answered.

    “That is an honorable profession,” the pastor said. “Where does he
    practice?”

    The old lady said proudly, “In Nevada. He has two cat houses in Las
    Vegas and one in Reno.”

    Liked by 5 people

  5. kjennings952 says:

    [Qualifier: I have teenage boys]:

    If you’re Russian going into the bathroom and Finnish coming out, what are you in between?
    European.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Quixie says:

    These actually made me laugh out loud, which is a rare thing. Bravo!

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s